Happy Halloween

Today, the biggest costume day of the year. But it is so fun to dress as some one else sometimes. Did I participate, No! I decided I would just be me. Sounds like a better plan if you ask me. So yeah I just decided to come to work as me, just a more dressed up version of me. SO I look some what nice. But I have been happy with the results. Ive gotten many compliments the last few days on my aparel. I like that. Generally I dress down so I am not so nice looking. I walked in a minute ago and Nates reaction was Wow Amanda. So that made me feel good. Then yesterday two of the prettiest girls here told me how nice I looked. So yeah I took that as the nice good feeling it gave me.
Anyways I just wanted to say Happy Halloween! Be safe all my friends!

So Im moody and totally pathetic last night. Whining and crying because Adam wasnt home. Finally I fall asleep at like 2:00, then even though I dont remember the conversation,
Adam calls and is home before 4:00. Yeah he says he called because he was lonely at his parents house but I dont remember. All I know is that I told him to come home and before 4:00 this morning I was snuggled up in bed next to him. Yeah I told you I was pathetic. Hes just absolutely wonderful though.
Good news of the week: Adam got a job! He is really excited about it. All that hard work and many many interviews has finally paid off. The only thing that I find unexciting about all this is that I wont get to see him very often. Our days off are going to be totally different. His Saturday, Sunday. Mine being Wednesday, Thursday. So yeah that Im totally unexcited about. But I am so very proud that his hard work and patience has paid off. I hope that he likes what he will be doing as much as I love what I do. Its always great to love your job. Thing is he is so good financially that I know that he will be great.
The joyous day arrived last week. I now have a new God Daughter. Her name is Jayden. I havent even seen pictures yet, but man did that just make my day. Im sure Kristy is glad to have that over with now. I know she was very uncomfortable towards the end of her pregnancy. But now that she is here I need to go to Texas just to meet her.
Hope is in North Carolina now. She says that it is beautiful on her base and around. She is about an hour from the shore. Her description of it is that it looks like God got bored one day and just started planting trees. Shes a big tom boy so trees are good. Maybe one day I will get up there to see her. I miss the munchkin.

And another World Series is over.

The mighty Houston Astros put forth their best foot, yet it wasnt enough. I am so proud to say that I am a fan of this team. They did a great job. Each game left you on the edge of your seat. They were exciting. Though I must admit that, yes, I did cry when game 4 was over and our Astros went home winless. They were amazing but not good enough. I do also admit that the other team was just so stellar that they were the better of the two teams. Sometimes all you can ask for is to just be a player in the game. I find that it is a great honor to have taken part in something that most will never have the opportunity to.
I am jealous however of Adams mother. She was at the Series while it was in Chicago. That brat. No Im just playing I love her. Shes wonderful. But dang I so wish I could have been there too. All I can say for next season is, try again next year boys. Dreams do come true. Long live the Astros!

No point today.

Ok well the Munchkin leaves us to go to North Carolina on Sunday. I just dont feel like I have spent enough time with her. Tomarrow Hope, Mom and I are going to take pictures together. I wish Lisa was here too. It is nice though that I will have a picture of us together. I hate when the kid is gone. I guess shes not really a kid anymore though. Gosh I am going to miss her. Even though we do talk about 5 or 6 times a week when she is gone, I dont like her being away.
My new upstairs neighbors are so loud! I swear if they are out on their balcony at 3 or 4 in the morning I am going to talk to the land lord. These people are ridiculous. They piss me off. The kid skate boards through the apartment. They turn the radio up so loud you can hear it coming into the entrance in the rear of the building. And if there is a Nebraska game on forget watching TV because the jerks have it turned up so loud you cant hear your tv on the highest volume. Yeah Im sick of them. They only just moved in a month ago. Im ready to just scream if they keep it up!
Im at work currently and just dying to eat. I feel like the little starved girl. Only because I hurt so badly this morning I didnt want to get out of bed. I actually laid in the tub for 45 minutes because my back hurt so badly. So of course I didnt eat before I got to work. Now I feel like a starved cow. Im hungry! That is all I can think about for the moment.

World Series Bound!

Recently I have been scrutinized for being a fan. I was told to quit being so excited for a team I BELIEVE IN! I was supposedly going to jinx them. Ok well heres my response to that, and those of you who know me know I dont get hostile often. When you believe in a team cheer them on. There is no such thing as jinxing anything! I dont care if you are superstitious do not come on to my blog and critisize me for being excited. Do not do it. I dont mind people having opinions, but if they cant be polite they wont be commenting on my blog. I do retaliate. Oh and guess I showed them because the boys pulled it off. Its all about who the better team is. I love the Astros. You wont catch me saying that I wont pull for them and be openly excited for these guys just so that some idiot is happy. Guess what buddy, the whole of Houston was more excited than me so get off my back.
Any ways to those of you who matter in my blog reading circle.... The Astros made it to the World Series. Remember weeks ago I took the stance that I didnt think they would because of the season the Cards had put up. Well as the series between these two teams progressed the more I could see the want in the eyes of the Astros players. Its people like Craig Biggio and Jeff Bagwell who have played for this team more than 2,000 games with out a World Series that I am more than extatic for. Its for the losers at the Houston Chronicle who marked them out with a giant headstone back in May that I dont believe have any right to call themselves fans. When you love a team so much you dont count them out mid season. You dont get into the Series and say they cant win. As I see it now, yes they can win this series. Yes they can get a pennant. I believe more than any team out there in the MLB association, these boys deserve it. It is a first for them. They have great defense and powerful hitters that are all underestimated in their value. They make people great then send them off to better teams only to realize that once they are no longer an Astro their big name is gone. Kent who? Beltran who? Big assets to a little team. Get big britches then cant do crap. Yeah these are guys my spirits rode on last year in post season. But the little team from Houston, Texas has proven themselves. They ARE the little team that can. But you know if they dont win, I wont cry. Im proud. Just like I was last year at this time when they went home to celebrate just making it to the second round.
So the moral of my blog today is: Dont get underexcited and then tell me to join you. If you love them join them in the excitement. If you believe in them speak up and wear your colors with pride. But if you speak against them dont comment on my blog because you are not a TRUE fan.

Oh I Can Almost Taste It!

Now with only one win to go, I can almost taste the WORLD SERIES!!!! My Houston Astros are just one victory away from the big dance!!!! Yehaw!!!!!!!!
So now Im more excited than anyone can handle! Yeah baby!!!!!

And they're off!

No Im not talking bout the dogs or horses. Im talking about the Astros. We have two more games at home in this series. If we win both we are in the World Series!!! Previously I had stated that the best world series in my opinion would be the Cards and the White Sox. Well upon review I believe that the best series Pitching Wise would be the White Sox and Astros. Thats the two number one pitching staffs. Hmmm so maybe I was wrong. Thing is that no matter which of my two favorite teams make the World Series their post season reality, I am happy and proud. They have both shown their right to that set of games. Nothing prides me more than a well played game. But for the time being all I can say is GO ASTROS!!!! 2 to go! World Series Bound!!!!

No title just random thoughts.

I know life cant be perfect,
So why do I expect it to be?
I know life cant be perfect,
But I cant except anything less.

I know I have flaws,
So why cant I find them in others?
I know I have flaws,
But I seem to be jealous at time of others.

I know imperfections are what make us unique,
So why do I question my differences?
I know imperfections are what make us unique,
But I want to be like everyone else.

I stole it from James

10 bands you've been listening a lot to lately:
1. Keith Urban
2. Cross Canadian Ragweed
3. Dave Matthews Band
4. Green Day
5. Jon Bon Jovi
6.Derks Bentley
7. Gary Allen
8. Roy Orbison (yeah i know)
9. Beethoven (yes i like Classical music)
10. Rob Thomas
09 things you look forward to:
1. Meeting my new God daughter
2. Friday
3. Paying off my next vehicle
4. Seeing Hope
5. Seeing Lisa
6. Getting home to see Adam
7. My next pay check
8. Dinner
9. Finishing School
8 things you like to wear:
1. Socks
2. my wholey jeans
3. Flip Flops
4. High Heels
5. Red Lipstick
6. Dangly earrings
7. Rings
8. Dresses
07 things that annoy you:
1. Banks
2. Cheaters
3. UT
4. Stupidity
5. Players
6. Dirty Fingernails
7. Gossip
06 things you say most days:
1. Good afternoon thank you for calling the lead desk this is Amanda, how may I assist you?
2. Shut up Adam
3. I love you
4. What up Ho! ( Hope knows)
5. Good evening thank you for calling Marriott Rewards Redemptions this is Amanda, may I have your confirmation number.
6. Bob! I need help!!!
05 things you do everyday:
1. Tell Adam I love him
2. Eat
3. Talk on the phone
4. Wonder where my dad is.
5. Laugh
04 people you want to spend more time with:
1. Hope
2. Lisa
3. Kristy
4. Kevin
03 movies you could watch over and over again:
1. Top Gun
2. Batman
3. Steel Magnolias
02 of your favorite songs at the moment:
1. Would have to be this way- Leigh Ann Rhymes
2. Have a nice day- Bon Jovi
01 person you could spend the rest of your life with:
1. Adam at this time.
.NUMBER OF: -
height:5'5
foot size- 7 1/2
color of hair- Blonde
siblings-2 sisters and 4 brothers
LAST: -
movie you rented: I cant remember that far back
Movie you bought- Frequency
song that was stuck in your head: The Oscar Myer bologna song
last person you called- Adam
tv show you've watched: Probably Connan O' Brien
Last person you were thinking of: Kristy
DO: -
you have a crush on someone: Just Adam
you wish you could live somewhere else: Not really
do you believe in online dating: Why not Ive met two of my boyfriends on line.
do others find you attractive: Ive been told so.
do you want more peircings: Only my ears are peirced I am sure it will stay that way.
do you write in cursive or print: both
FAVORITE: -
food: Lasagna
thing to do: Nothing on my day off with Adam
thing to talk about: Baseball
drinks: Cherry Coke (cant have it no more) and Iced Tea
clothes: Socks and my wholy jeans.
movies: Depends on the day. Top Gun is my favorite movie though
holiday: Fourth of July
HAVE YOU: -
ever cried over a girl: Yes I cried when Kristy found out she was pregnant
over a boy: Dont remind me. Neither deserved it.
ever been in a fist fight: Sure Have.
ever been arrested: Nope, the cops are my friends.
WHAT-
shampoo do you use: Aussie
shoes do you wear: I own lots of shoes varies day to day.
are you scared of: Water.
number of people I would classify as true, could trust with my life type friends: Kevin, Kristy and Adam
number of people I consider my enemies: Nope none.
FAVORITE: -
Disney movie: Brother Bear
word: HONEY!!!!!!!!!
nickname: Im not even going there I have too many
eye color: Brown.
flower: yellow roses
DO YOU THINK YOU ARE: -
pretty/handsome: Ehhh
funny: yes I am
hot: umm no
friendly: always
amusing: Yep
ugly: no way
caring: I will help even the people i dont like.
sweet: yes
dorky: Around my family
DESCRIBE YOUR:
Wallet – Black leather with Elvis on it.
Jewelry worn daily- Watch, necklace with Hopes Squadran on it, and a ring
Pillow cover – varies
Underwear – Different every day.
Favorite shirt - Dont know that I really have one
Perfume/cologne – Gossip
CD in stereo right now – a mixed one Hope made
What you are wearing now – A white t-shirt, tan pants and undergarments
In my mouth – teeth and my tongue
In my head – Useless knowledge
Wishing – That I wasnt working Christmas and Christmas Eve and New years Eve.
Person you wish you could see right now –Nana
Something you're looking forward to in the upcoming month – Nothing too much
Do you like the taste of blood – Umm No
Do you believe in love – Yeah
Do you believe in Heaven - Yes.
If you could have any animal for a pet, what would it be – An Elephant
What's your favorite coin – I dont know.....

Now that I am over feeling like crap, I am hungry. Not just your every day hungry either. I want spicy food. I had some of the best home made hot sauce ever. It was so funny Hal gave me a chip with a chunk of this wonderful hot sauce. Then asked what I thought. With out batting an eye I said "a little spicy but good!" He bout died. Every one has thought that it was really hot. So now they all think that I have high tolerance to the peppers. But I really want more now. Nope just grew up in Texas. The spicier the better.
Mmm Mmm Mmm. I want more spicy stuff!!!!!

I feel terrible..

So this form of birth control that my doctor put me on is nice, but today I feel like crap. I dont even think I will make it through my shift at work tonight. I have put myself on the downtime list though. That almost never happens but I did it anyways. But if I cant make it I will at least hold out until 630 tonight. Thats half of my shift so thats not so bad. Esp since I have given away half of my shift away Friday. So then I would just keep that half and wouldnt be affected to much. Anyways. I just dont feel good and Adam is proving to be just wonderful. I had the NOrwalk virus a few weeks ago and he took care of me for two days. Last night when I started feeling badly he started taking care of me. Hes a wonderful person. I dont know what I would do with out him, esp when I am sick. But in all fairness Doc did warn me that this might happen. So I guess I should have expected it. But I have to admit I didnt. I never had problems with my old birth control so I expected this to be the same. But then again I can see why this one would affect me considering its a patch... It is continuous rather than once aday. So I guess I just have to suck it up and get used to this before the yuck goes away.....

Return Successful!

The munchkin is officially home now. We got her from the airport yesterday morning. Then surprised my mother at lunch. Mom didnt know that Hope would be home yesterday. She really believed that Hope would be home today. We had that woman completly convinced of it. So yesterday was completely busy. We were at moms all day. Adam came over at like 7 in the morning. So he completely surprised me. I was not expecting him at all. Well then we waited at the airport for like an hour for Hope and she was actually in the airport the entire time. Yeah Im a dork I know. Hope took a nap while the boys played baseball and football outside and mom and I went shopping for a few minutes.
Exciting find of the day for me was that I got Adam and I wine glasses. I was so excited about that. So now we have wine glasses instead of drinking out of coffee mugs when we have wine. Yipee!! Then Adam and I went home and cleaned up and such. Watched part of the game, decided that if we stayed at home we would fall asleep. So we went back to moms. When we got there I got all up into that ball game. Boy did it get good. The Astros whipped up on Atlanta. But today they topped it! 18 innings at home and they took Atlanta! Yippee!!!
So after the game Hope decided that she wanted to go out. So we all went bowling. We had so much fun. Adam bowled a game that exceeded 200 I on the other hand never cleared 75, then again I never do.
After bowling we decided we would go back home to go to sleep. We decided to finish our movie that we have now been trying to watch for three days. But no we started falling asleep and went to bed instead. So yeah Adam and I are just really on weird sleeping schedules right now. But then again we always are.
He came and got me for my lunch break. So we had lunch together tonight. It was nice. Since I went to the doc the other day and she told me to cut the caffine, Im having a bit of a problem with craving it. Thing is before I had already more than 50% cut my caffine intake. So why is it bothering me??? I dont know but it is really annoying.

Round 2

And suddenly the Astros find themselves again facing the Cardinals for the second year in a row in round 2 of MLB playoffs. I am a huge Astros fan. Heres the conflict for me. I love the Cards too. But I pull all the way for my Astros. So if something happens and the Cards end up in the series Im still happy but I would love to see my Astros in the world series. I would love it even more if the good old boys won it. But Im a good sport. Last year the stinky team won. And lets face it they were not the best team. I am not arguing that they didnt deserve the ring. They just werent the best team overall last year. Like I said thats just my opinion. DONT GET MAD AT ME FOR OPINION. Thought I would make that straight.
All Im sayin is I am glad that those two teams are in the running and I know that the games that are getting ready to ensue will be good. Regardless of the fact that I want the Astros to win this coming series, I honestly think the best World Series match up would be between the Cardinals and White Sox. They to me are the two best teams in the running. But dont get me wrong I want the Astros to be the champs. Thats just me.

T minus 13 hours and 5 minutes

The munchkin will return as of 1010 am tomarrow morning. So I am off to the airport as soon as I can in the morning. We are going to surprise mom. Mom thinks that Hope will be home Sunday afternoon. But thats not true. I am so extatic it is crazy!!
Yeah so tonight if Matt and I dont go bowling just to calm our nerves we are gonna clean all night. My bathroom is in severe need of a bath! After feeling like an elephant sat on me last week, I have been sooo lazy! Adam cleaned my kitchen the other morning so now I just have to make sure it stays that way.
Recently I have taken to drinking coffee. Just as my doc says that I have to cut it out. Yeah so Ive never liked coffee and now that I do I cant have it. Tell me how fair that is!

All Shook Up

And today I have not much to say as of yet. I dont know yet what my day will bring. Yeah sure its after 4:00 pm and all but I have so much left for the day. I will be talking to the munchkin on my lunch break. Then she has a plan of some sort. So I have a feeling it has to do with surprising our mommy. I wont know until after 7:00 or so tonight.

Astros update! We are up 1-0 on NCLS championship divisional playoffs. And oh isnt victory sweet when its against the Braves. Its a repeat of the playoffs last year. First round anyways. I need to check the schedule for the next two games but if they win this next one then there will be no more. This set is best of five. So Go ASTROS!

Now Im open to ideas. Adam is way ahead of me on Christmas. Yes we are already shopping for Christmas. The sooner we can get it out of the way the better, right. Well. I know hes already gotten me two different things. I dont even have an idea on what to get him!! His sisters are going to help me out but I am open to any suggestions with in reason. Hes such a complex person and if I ask what he wants he just says he wants me to be back in school. Ok well for his birthday I took him at word when he said not to do anything. But that was so not cool, he thought I would do something anyways. So not meaning to I hurt him alot. So I wanna avoid that at any cost. I just dont know what to do for him even though I have been with him almost six months. Help! Any ideas will be appreciated.

Return of the Munchkin!

We arent 100% sure of the exact date as of yet. But the munchkin shall be returning in a matter of days. If all goes well she will be home Saturday! Yippee! I miss the munchkin in a bad way. One day I will have to stop calling her that considering she has grown up and placed herself in such a position of distinction in my eyes. Does one out grow her childhood nick name from her older sister? I hope not. I do not call her this when people are around. But when I was on base for her BMT graduation I did call her Munchkin. She will always be my little munchkin, my mini me.
So for all the confusion and unsure moments I have had this week I eagerly await the return of the munchkin. I miss her so terribly, even though I talk to her most nights. It is weird for her to be so far away. I never got used to her not being in the house. Now that shes not in a home with either of our parents and nor am I, I am really not used to this. Its like some one is missing. I dont have anyone to scream at the baseball games with me.
So whats really cool about her coming home at this time is that she will be home in time for base ball playoffs. If anyone remembers my blog this time last year, we went nuts with World Series Playoffs. We are huge Astros fans. Yet again our boys are the Wild card slot winners! SO.... GO ASTROS! Updates on the return of the Munchkin to follow!

I wonder...

She sits and stares out the window wondering if he will ever just grow up......

How is it I never know what to believe if it comes from him....

Why does the thought of not talking to him bother me but I cant answer the phone when he calls......

If he is in need why do I want to help but if I am the one in need he runs to hide.....

How can you know and trust some one your whole life then realize it may have all been a farse......

These are the things I wonder sometimes and things I have felt for a while when it comes to talking to or about my father. He is my father but why do I feel like he should just live his life and grow up rather than making the four of us crazy and worried all the time???

Heaven on Earth

Life is in this continuum that makes my head spin at times. It amazes me how I can wait all day to go home and see Adam, then when I get there I am still excited to see him. You know at some point I lost that with Toby. I stopped getting excited early. I would only get excited to see him after days, weeks or months of him not being around. But with my Adam, its all so different. If he is gone for even an hour I am beaming when I see him again. He makes me laugh, and smile. I know I am lucky to have him.
The beauty in this relationship is that I know that no matter what happens I appreciate the small things that before I didnt. So I guess if I hadnt been through hell with Toby I would not know that some of the little things he does and says are sweet. Ive learned that it isnt really the grand gestures that I want. Its the little things like a kiss on the forehead or a touch of the hand that add up and mean so much more to me.
Adam's indeed taught me a thing or two about what love is. I went into this relationship with the attitude that I had experience in a serious, long term relationship. I didnt want to let anything or anyone know the side of me that has weakness. Infact I was nothing but mean and had my mind up that I would run anyone off that came at me. So it took Adam forever to get that second date with me. I knew I wanted to go out with him again. But I didnt want to let myself into another possibly disasterous relationship.
I just knew that if I let this wonderful man into my life I would screw it up again. Sure enough I just about did. I fought off his requests just to hang out for five weeks. I spent countless hours talking to him and avoiding any thought of another date. Until finally one day when he asked me what was so wrong with him that I wouldnt give him another shot. Thats when it hit me, I was really wrong for the way I was treating this guy.
For the first time in my life I was actually contemplating the idea of a nice guy. One that I knew so much about. One I had barely known a few months. Yet from the sincerity that I had seen that one night and over the phone those countless hours, I knew that I could trust him. But my problem now was, could he trust me? Could he trust me not to bail out when things got tough, not to freak out at the first sign of seriousness?
Yes we have had our moments where we just want to leave. But something draws us back to each other with in moments. Either of us have seriously walked out in a heated arguement only to return with in a minute to tell the other how very sorry we were and that we love each other. There are days when we both just feel like the world is over and that we cant possibly look at the other one. But it has yet to last longer than a few hours. If that long.
I know we are far from perfect. But I know, for now at least, I have found my peice of heaven on earth and I dont want it to ever go away.

Cars and School....

Oh the woes of having to buy a new car. I am in this position. I have been looking for right at a month now. So I went ahead and applied for a loan. Yeah I have no credit though so did the bank even give me a second thought? Nope. So I have to do it on my own.
Until yesterday I had my Daddy Bills car. I knew I needed to give it back. So I gave it back for the weekend at least on Friday night. I figured I didnt need a car until today to get to work anyways. So last night Adam and I went out with his new brother in law. I love Blair hes the coolest. Well we were all just kinda getting drunk and gambling. Yeah we all went and wasted time on the ever occupying penny slots. Adam and I can play all freakin night on ten dollars.
Anyways like I was saying, the three of us were sitting around totally wasting money. Afterwards we were all feeling the alcohol just a little too much so we decided to eat at the casino. So we have dinner at 3:00 in the morning. The subject of my car comes up. This is just totally depressing to me. Blair looks up and says "Amanda I have my old Ford Ranger. Can you drive a stick?" I was like uh huh. Cause I learned on a manual transmission. So.... After about an hour of talking he offered to let me buy his truck. Even better hes letting me drive it for a while until I decide if I want this truck. Ok well, I have had this truck for a day now and I like it. Its got a few flaws that are minor and easy to fix. He is gonna put a new 4 wheel drive switch in it for me. Since winter is coming up and I may need it.
So I am excited cause my car woes may be over. See what would I do with out Adam? And have I ever mentioned that I love his family? They really are wonderful people. These are people that I dont know where I would be with out. Adam, mainly, but his family is so wonderful and supportive. Im starting school in the winter and Blair is gonna tutor me when I need it in Algebra. Even though Adam is the human calculator, Blair is gonna do it so that I can get frustrated but with it being him Im not gonna get all upset and feel stupid. As if I was with Adam, I would feel inferior because he is soo smart. But when it comes to writing a paper he is really good. I on the other hand used to be good at writing essays and reports. Now Im so out of practice, Im lucky if this blog finds any good favor in it.
So I am totally nervous about school. Yeah I still have a few months before I start but the closer it gets the more I want to jump out a window. I have that itch. Im afraid I am gonna fail. I dont handle failure very well at all. I have always been a bit of a perfectionist with little room for error when it comes to learning. I like to make sure I know everything to the best of my abilities. I figure theres no point in being in a classroom if you are not gonna try. Dont just show up to take up a seat in the class. Thats just ridiculous, not only does a non participative, non caring student waste space, they make every one else dumber with their presence. Maybe thats harsh, but I cant stand a student that is just there to say there were there. So I am serious about learning, shoot me.
Ok guys Im getting out of here. I have some work to do. Later all!