Dave and Gavin personal review

Ok so now that the crap has been written down for consumption of the general masses. Heres the fun stuff.
We went to see Dave Matthews and Gavin DeGraw on Sunday night. Yeah it was a great show. I think though that I enjoyed Gavin DeGraw the most because he was extremely crowd pleasing. I love an interactive entertainer. He jumped off the stage and walked through the crowds. It was just hilarious.
Dave played for a long time. They just didnt play as much of the music that they are known for as many of the people around me expected. Several people sitting in our vacinity commented on this. Where generally I love to just listen to the bands jam out, thats like all they did. Im talking 5 minute intros, longer endings. You litterally could have gotten up and gone to get a drink or to the restroom in between every single song. Dont get me wrong it was a great show. But when you pay 60.00 a ticket thats just disappointing. Even Adams sisters felt that way. These girls are die hard. They go to see these guys everytime they are in driving distance. So they have seen them several times. We did enjoy ourselves though. Like I said it was a great concert I just would have loved to see more interaction from Dave and more of the music that we love and less jam sessions. Maybe Im spoiled but thats how I feel. I am still a fan. I still love their music, but I am just generally disappointed in the show.

Returning dream

Lately I have been having terrible dreams. One I have already shared. But they keep coming. Every time I escape but some one I love does not. The person that is terrorizing me is someone I moved states away from. Some one who has always since the day he entered my life, struck fear in the depths of my soul. Only later to find out my fears were very wise. There was always something about him that sat bad with me. Then the local police gave me background on him. Yeah so I thought that when I left Texas I would never think of him again.
Why all of the sudden is he showing up in my dreams and causing me so much pain and hurting the ones I love the most. Even people that I have just slight associations with. I am to the point that if I am at home alone I do not sleep for fear of not being able to stop the dreams this time. Last night Adam was not home and I slept only two hours before he was home to get ready for work. I could not sleep and if I did start to doze off the slightest noise caused me to come to full alert.
I feel haunted by this person and these horrible dreams. They have only gotten worse and more graphic. Adam has woke me up once and I have managed to wake myself up several other times. Thing is these dreams are so disgusting I dont feel comfortable nor safe disclosing exactly what happens in them. I of coarse tell Adam. I dont tell my mother because I dont want her to freak out and suggest a shrink. Forget that. I am not paying some guy to sit and listen to me spill my soul about something that is not real. My only question is why does this keep happening????

Items of thought today

Tomarrow is the day Adam has been waiting for for a long time. We will be on our way to see Dave Matthews Band tomarrow night. This is Adams favorite band. Ok Im not the biggest fan but I have always enjoyed their music. Fan yes, fanatic no. Needless to say though, I am excited. I am excited because Adam is trying not to be. Every year he opts not to go with his sisters. This year he finally decided to give in and go with them. I know that tomarrow he will be unbearably crazy to live with until after the concert is over. He is already fidgety and cant sit still. Almost like time can not move by fast enough. Hes so cute.
Next item up for bid....
I heard from an old friend the other day. Which normally that kind of thing is a joy. But why did my skin crawl this time?? Hope ask why later I will tell you in depth.
Next on the chopping block....
The Christmas tree is up, the living room is decorated. Adam and I walk around humming ridiculous holiday tunes. Why do I love this season so much, yet dread it every year for the remaining seasons?
Last but certainly not least.....
Why is it that I pick stupid crap to dwell on.... That kinda goes with the second item up for bid. But I do have that tendancy. I cant let go of stuff. One day I hope to do so .

Strange dream....

Last night I got home early. I had intended to spend a little extra time with Adam but he was already asleep. So I sat in the living room sort of reading a book, watching an old old movie that made me cry as usual. Then talked to my munchkin. I was the biggest sulk. I just sat there and cried about everything. I cried because I have no one I hang out with other than Adam and that his sister is the only friend I have that I do hang out with. Because yes I have friends but they are all at work. Then I cried because all of my real friends outside of Omaha have gotten married and had babies and I dont get to talk to them anymore. That is with the exception of Kristy and she has both of those. Then I cried because I miss my Kevin. Then because I hate what is up with my father. I was a total mess. I cried because I miss my sisteres. I was such a dork. Hope was so sweet tho. She just listened while I cried. Then I went to sleep.
Im gonna say around 730 or so this morning I woke Adam up. I dont remember doing that though. But I do remember what he said I told him. Apparently I was having a panic attack.
I told him that the man was chasing me. He said that I was crying and breathing really heavy.
Well I know I probably was because I remember the dream. This man broke into my house killed the others that were there and continued to terrorize me until the sun came up. Then I screamed and cried and Carey came in and distracted him. After watching him lose the knife and Carey retrieve it I ran down the street and to some one elses house. He allowed me to call the cops, when I dialed the cops it was the electric company. I looked out the window and saw the man coming down the street. I hid behind the couch and got very quiet. The man entered the house I was in and asked the man whose phone I was using where I was. He pretended not to know what he was talking about. Then the man fell dead on the side of the couch. Umm.. What?? I remember waking up with my head in Adam's side. Then went back to sleep. Yeah weird huh?? Thing is I think I know who the stranger was......

Hectic

So I havent written in several days. Its been a very busy set of days. Between home and work I am totally exhausted. I have taken to getting up with Adam in the mornings before he goes to work. Then taking a nap and getting up to go to work of my own. Then when I get home he is already in bed asleep so I just crawl into bed and try not to wake him. So Im off tomarrow. But it will be a full day. I will get up with him then go spend the day with my mom. Write out the remaining part of my bills. Get that taken care of. Around 2:00 or so I am going to go home and get dinner ready so that when Adam comes home we can eat and leave. I have new student orientation to go to. But since our time is so few and far between right now we take every opportunity to spend that time either of us is off together. Our days off are totally different. His Saturday, Sunday. Mine Wednesday, Thursday.
Starting on the 30th of this month I wont have Wednesdays off either. That is one of my school days. Monday mornings I also have a class. So it is about to get hectic in my home. Between Adam's schedule and my schedule it is crazy already. I am actually looking forward to being at home when he gets there tomarrow. So is he actually. We were talking about that tonight when we went to dinner. We have decided that now that we dont get to see each other as much we will just go ahead and meet up for dinner once a week. That way we get to spend a little more time with each other. Even though my lunch break is only 30 minutes. It is enough time to feel like I actually got to see him today.
How is it that I have fallen so hard for him when just a few months ago I had sworn that I would never do that again? He is every thing that I have ever wanted and more. I have a smile on my face no matter what these days. He makes all the bad go away even when I dont think that it is possible. I sound like a teenage girl now. But gosh hes just so wonderful. Even when we argue we cant stay away from each other. I dont know how my heart can find such peace in another person. Its crazy.
Now that I have sounded totally twitterpatted, I will let you guys all puke in private. Then again I dont think I have heard from anyone in forever. But hey thats life.

The Patch

So I am currently re-evaluating my form of birth control. Seems the FDA put out a warning a few days ago about the patch. But so far mine is working just beautifully, of coarse there are side effects of any form. Aside from the fact that it is like a bandaid that you can not change for seven days, it is wonderful.
Supposedly now they are warning that it causes blood clots and such effects. I have read two articles now on the "problems" and just wonder if the woman in the interview at the end just wants to scare people because she had problems. I do however not believe that some one died from it. All birth controls have these warnings and warn that if taken improperly death has occurred. But now I wonder should I switch methods when this is the only form that has ever worked on me.
This is the first time that I have taken any for of birth control that hasnt made me extremely emotional or totally irritable. I have talked to several people that I know who either use this patch or have taken it. All have mixed ideas on it.
Adams family knows this is our method. They are all scared now that I am going to end up sick. Well I want them not to worry but I am still not too sure of what I am going to do about this yet.
Carey says the only reason that she is really worried about it is because of my size. Maybe if I had a little more fat on my body she would not worry so much. Carey is a doctor so I trust her judgement on these things. She is really very smart. When I first started the patch she kept up with Adam on how I was doing. Checked on every side effect I had with her advisors and kept Adam calm on how I reacted as my body adjusted. So I dont know what to think. Maybe I will go talk to her again and see what she thinks of my situation. You know with out her brother sitting there on pins and needles. Then make this decision in the most informed way possible.
What is the general opinion of my dear friends though, I do wonder. If you would like to read up on this before stating an opinion here is a website....
http://msnbc.msn.com/id/9997384
Your opinion would be greatly appreciated. Thanks!

School and Chicago

Ok so I am two steps closer to getting back into school. I have to go enroll and file my extension for tuition but other than that I am set. Looks like the end of the month I will be a student again. Yipee! Actually yes I am finally excited about it. Looks like all my pale grant will be approved which means I will be going to school for nothing. The grant will pay for everything. I was supposed to get up this morning and go register but low and behold I overslept. Yeah so the new darkness in my room may not be a good idea for that reason. I dont want to get out of bed. Now if I would have seen some light this morning my butt may have gotten up. Yeah so I think I am in trouble with Adam now. He is really working his butt off to get me to get back into school. I need to make an appointment now with an advisor then with finanial aid. That way I am at least enrolled. Oh why does school have to be such a big deal? No really I am excited about it though.
I am more excited at the moment however about our trip this week coming up to Chicago. Adam and I are running away for two days to Chicago. Gosh I love working for Marriott. Hotels are so inexpensive that way. We are actually staying 25 miles from downtown in a Resort in Oakbrook. I am so excited. We will be just absolutely relaxed. That is as long as I dont manage to put us in crap moods like I did when we went to Kansas City. Yeah Im famous for screwing the good stuff up. This is our last chance to really get out until I can do something to get my schedule changed to match my days off to his at least some what. Other than that we wont be spending much time together unless its sleeping. That could be very stressful so I want our trip to be perfect. I have a few ideas too that might just help.