So I won't lie, I miss having someone to say goodnight to and sleep in the same bed with. This part of single really sucks. I miss the companionship of it all. Sometimes I reach over to the otherwise of the bed and then it hits me I'm still alone. I wonder when there will ever be another person there.
My best guy friend tells me, frequently, to move on and try new things. Ken gets it. He's been there too. It sucks. He knows things I have barely told anyone about why this hurts so much. I swear the next person to chastise me for not being over it, may just end up with a black eye.
This has been 4 if the hardest months in my life and I really have barely scratched the surface when it comes to revealing what happened. I know I deserve more and better, but I am sick of hearing it. It hurts me more and no one else has to feel my pain but me.
I am moving on, but when you shared that kind of connection with someone it doesn't just fade. Please forgive my need to heal at my own pace. It's the only way I know how to do it.
2 comments:
We all heal in degrees, and the people who tell you to move on sometimes forget how hard it was for them to move on. Patience and deep breaths.
sometimes they dont get it. no one wants to let me do it at my own pace. I just need time. not sure why this time is different, and believe me i would give my left foot for it to be just normal. I hate every piece of what is going on with my emotional status. i would love to say i was 100% im just not. yes I am trying but there are still nights i cry myself to sleep and just cant stop. dont get me wrong. its getting better. im a million times better than i was but my heart is still hanging on, and thats not something i can just change even though i wish like hell i could.
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